The Queen of Scorpia
by LilStrawbaby
Summary: My take on the animosity between the President and the Admiral since day one.
1. Chapter 1

The Queen of Scorpia

By: LittleStrawbaby

Rating: T

A/N: OK, apparently I'm shipping R/A now. Go figure. We'll see how long it lasts. smirk 

_I have cancer, La La. This is the last vacation we may ever have. Please don't act like this._

The sixteen year old glanced over at her sleeping mother and sighed. She tossed her magazine into the empty seat between them and stared out the window of the transport until her stomach started to roll.

It puzzled her, her behavior with regard to this trip. She truly was excited about going to the shore; Scorpia was absolutely gorgeous with its tropical weather and exotic sights. Her mother had spared no expense on this trip and it wasn't as if they had a never-ending well of money to draw from. And she had done nothing but complain and make it harder for her mother.

Nothing had fazed Evelyn Roslin until a week before the trip, when Laura had been at her worst. She had raged and shouted at her mother for taking her away from her friends for the summer to take a boring trip with (horror of horrors) her _mother_. It was then she had sternly reined her daughter in. Even the sullen silent treatment was a relief from the childish tantrums.

Laura was the only child she had and life hadn't been easy for the girl. Evelyn had suffered with near-debilitating depression after the death of her husband, when Laura was only two. Much of the time, Laura took care of Evelyn; by the age of six, she could cook soup and make sandwiches to ensure they ate, gave her mother her medication and did light housekeeping.

Evelyn didn't begrudge her daughter her youth, on the contrary. She was pleased that Laura had a distinct sense of self. She was a straight-A student, President of her class and a cheerleader for the varsity football team. Laura had always been a bright and upbeat child and the thought of her daughter losing out to care for her panicked Evelyn.

"Mama? We're here," Laura said. She shook her mother gently with one hand as she gathered her things and shoved them into her backpack.

"La La? We're there already?" Evelyn asked, groggy.

Impatiently, her daughter responded, "Yes, we've landed. We have to get off now."

"All right. Can you grab my carry on?"

"Yes."

"There's no need to get testy, young lady."

"I'm sorry, mama."

The older woman pulled her into a one-armed hug, stroking her silky mahogany curls. "I know, baby. C'mon, let's get out of here and have some fun."

Laura's world was turned upside down two weeks later. Her mother contracted pneumonia and was hospitalized, leaving Laura to come and go as she pleased, completely unsupervised. It didn't bother the girl in the least. She visited her mother twice a day and spent the rest of her time exploring the city.

Scorpia, being ninety-five percent tourism, had its own laws regarding pesky things like legal drinking age and drug use. Namely, one only had to be sixteen to drink and all drugs were legal.

Laura had befriended a couple staying the in same hotel on their honeymoon. She went out with them every evening, partying until they stumbled back to the hotel. She was hanging out with an older, far more experienced crowd than herself, but it was certainly educational. After three weeks, she was certain this was the best summer of her life and her friends at home would be deliciously envious.

She was dancing with a handsome man with blond hair when a navy blue uniform caught her attention. Her body stopped moving and she stared as the man broke up a scuffle between a taller drunken man, also in uniform, and a man in a pastel shirt and white linen suit. Her partner's hands found her waist and pulled her tightly against him, but she pushed him away, wandering over to the fistfight.

"What happened?" she asked.

A pretty blond woman spoke up quickly, "That jerk over there started a fight with my boyfriend." She pointed to the man in the sissy linen suit. "What's with that getup anyway?"

"Got me. I've never seen anything like it. Maybe he's from Canceron. You know how they are."

"Yeah, a bunch of weirdos." The blond turned to her, smiling, and stuck out her hand. "I'm Ellen."

"Laura," she responded, shaking the other woman's hand. "Is he OK? Your boyfriend, I mean."

"Who Saul? Hell yeah! Even when he's drunker than Cootie Brown he can whup ass."

"Who's the other guy?"

"That's Bill Adama."

"The pilot?"

"Yeah, that's him. You're not one of his groupies, are you? That's _so_ lame."

"No, I'm not a groupie. I heard an interview with him over the wireless a few months ago, when the war ended. He sounded very nice."

"He is very nice. And very boring."

"Boring?"

"Are you gonna to repeat everything I say?"

"No, I'm just curious." She was staring openly at the shorter, black-haired man, now intrigued. It was then he chose to look up and meet her eyes. Laura felt a strange jolt in her chest and her face flushed hotly. "He's very handsome."

"Ah yes. It's the eyes. Adama blue, Saul calls them. Saul's my boyfriend, by the way."

"Well, I hope everyone's OK. It was nice to meet you, Ellen."

"Wait, aren't you going to stay and have a drink with us? I think Bill'd like to meet you."

"Oh, well, I'm here with friends. They'll wonder what happened to me."

"Tell 'em you're coming over here with us for awhile. They'll deal."

"Um, maybe I should go. I don't want to interrupt—"

"You see me whup that dickhead's ass?" Saul bellowed, grinning like an idiot, "I showed him good!"

"You sure did, baby," Ellen cooed.

Laura wanted to throw up as she made big over him and then they started playing tonsil hockey.

"Hey," a low voice greeted.

Laura turned and found herself staring into the bluest eyes she'd ever seen. A smile graced her face involuntarily and she returned his greeting.

"I'm Bill."

"I know. I'm Laura."

"Nice to meet you, Laura."

"Same here. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude. I was being nosy and then I met Ellen, who insisted I stay and have a drink with you."

"Oh please do. Anything to get that meddling harpie off my back."

Laura laughed. "Gee, thanks. Throw me under the bus."

Bill's olive skin darkened. "That didn't come out right."

"Sure."

"Really, I didn't mean it like that. I'm, well, truthfully, I'm glad to have someone not-Ellen to talk to."

"Yeah, that's the same impression I got."

"Why don't you let me buy you a drink?"

Laura glanced around. She saw the couple looking in her direction and she waved to them, signaling that she was all right. They nodded and left the bar.

"Do you have somewhere to be?" he asked, his raspy voice sending shivers down her spine.

"No, not at all. I came with them."

"Oh, I see. I'll see to it that you get home safely then."

"Thank you."

"Not a problem. So, do you live here?"

Laura laughed. "Oh no. I'm here on vacation. Do you live here?"

"Nope, shore leave. This wasn't my idea but I have to say I'm glad that I came along now."

They shared a smile and the bartender sat their drinks in front of them.

"To meeting new friends," Bill said.

"New friends," Laura chimed in.

Bill walked her to the door of her hotel room, their arms linked. She stopped outside her door and turned to smile at him.

"I think this is the first time I've come home sober in a week," she joked.

"Kinda cool being on this side of it, huh?" he chuckled.

"Gods, now I'm paranoid about how I may have acted. I really hope I didn't sing bad songs by over-glorified pop stars like that one group did."

"Seems to me you were in pretty good hands but things like that do happen."

She laughed and slid her keycard into the reader, opening the door. She stepped inside and turned on the lights.

"Wanna come in for awhile?"

"Uh, sure." He stepped into the room, looking around curiously. "Where are your friends?"

"Oh no, we're not here together. I actually met them a week and a half ago at dinner before—well, that's when I met them. Greg and Tracey; they're here on their honeymoon. They let me tag along with them when they go out at night to party and make sure I get back here."

"You don't really seem like a party girl."

"I'm not. It's just been a really stressful three weeks."

"You've been here that long?"

"Yeah I—" She blew out a breath and looked him in the eye. "I'm here with my mom. She got pneumonia and she's in the hospital. I've been on my own for a week and, well, there's not much to do between hospital visits. I've already been to the beach, seen the sights around our hotel and tour groups don't interest me."

"I'm sorry about your mom. Is she going to be all right?"

"She's got breast cancer and her immune system is weak, that's why she got sick. That's also why we're here, on this vacation. It could be our last." Her eyes widened as she realized how much she had revealed to this man, a virtual stranger. "I can't believe I'm telling you all of this."

"It's OK, you can trust me."

"I know, I sense it. Ellen said you were boring and I guess by her wild standards, you are. But I like your boringness."

"My boringness?"

She giggled and flopped onto one of the double beds, staring at the ceiling.

"Yeah. Which colony are you from?"

"Caprica. You?"

"The same. Have you lost the ability to construct sentences?" she teased.

"No. I'm more interested in you."

"There really isn't anything interesting about me."

"What college are you going to?"

"I'm not in college." She closed her eyes.

"I see. How old are you?"

"How old are _you_?" Rolling onto her side, she propped her head on her palm, her green eyes piercing.

"Are you planning to go to college?"

"Yeah, after I get my mom, well, settled. Did you go to college?"

"No, I joined the military."

"Do you like it?"

"I do, actually."

"I heard your interview on the wireless a few months ago."

Bill's expression was embarrassed. "Please don't hold that against me. I didn't want to do it but my superiors informed me it would give the military a good showing."

"Because so many people were against the war."

"Yeah."

Laura sat up on the bed, facing him. "I admire you guys. You're protecting people you don't even know. And you weren't even forced into service—it was a life you chose. I mean, you guys are willing to die for us, to ensure our way of life. That's cool."

"It's something you're called to. Kind of like being a doctor to heal people or politicians who actually help people. What do you want to do with your life?"

"I think I want to be a teacher," she admitted. "I've had some really great teachers who've inspired me to want to give to others. And if nothing else, having knowledge is important."

"Yes, it is very important. I think it's a good choice and, I mean, I don't really know you, but it seems to suit you."

"My mama isn't really happy about it. She thinks I'm wasting my potential. I keep hoping she'll understand why I want to teach.

"I tutor kids, in all subjects. I'm good at it, I'm good with them, and it gives me such a sense of accomplishment when they _get_ it. You know, when the light bulb goes off in their head and they understand? It's a rush."

She sees him staring at her intently and she feels a flood of embarrassment. Lowering her head, her long hair obscured her burning face. She's certain she's made a fool of herself in front of him and now he'll make excuses to leave. And avoid her for the remainder of his leave.

"I'm sorry. You must think I'm an idiot."

"No, not at all! You're wonderful. I never thought I'd meet anyone as passionate about living their dream as I am."

"You mean being a Viper pilot?"

Bill nodded.

"I really do understand," she said, "It's as important to you to protect and serve our worlds as it is to me that I help children learn and grow as people."

He noticed, suddenly, how closely they were leaning together. He leaned forward those few extra inches, their lips meeting. They both felt it, the flash of desire, and the kiss deepened.

Without parting, they stood and moved closer, his arms slipping around her waist, hers around his neck. Their bodies molded together, fitting together as if they had been created for each other; two halves that formed a perfect whole.

They broke for air, breathing heavily, their eyes locked. He was fascinated by the fire he saw in the depths of her pale eyes and reality crashed in on him. Pecking her on the lips, he backed away, raking his fingers through his thick hair. He tried to ignore the confusion he saw on her face and was compelled to explain.

"I really like you, Laura. A lot. But I don't think this is a good idea."

"What?" Her voice was dangerously low, her eyes glittering.

"We hardly know each other and I want to change that. I don't think rushing into something physical is the best thing."

"We were kissing, not ripping each other's clothes off."

"And how long do you think that would've taken?"

She was floored by his honesty—and by his chivalry. Wasn't it supposed to be dead? He was seriously concerned about _her_, not himself.

"You're right, Bill," she admitted.

Switching gears before he upset her, he asked, "What are you doing tomorrow?"

"I have no plans."

"Great. Why don't we go exploring?"

"Exploring what?"

"The city, goofball."

She smiled and nodded. "Sure, sounds great. It doesn't sound so bad when there's someone to see it with."

"Great. How about I pick you up around oh-nine-hundred?"

"At what time?"

Chuckling, he said, "I'm sorry, habit. I meant nine tom—well, today."

"That's fine with me."

"Ok then, great."

They smiled at each other, both feeling goofy about it but neither ready to let go of the moment. He lightly held her upper arms and pulled her into a hug.

"I had a great time tonight," he whispered huskily in her ear.

"Mmm, so did I," she said. She wrapped her arms around his waist, hugging him back, "I'm so glad I was feeling nosy."

"So am I."

Reluctantly, they released each other and she followed him to the door. He pulled it open and stood in the doorway, their gazes locked. She leaned against the door, her temple resting on the wood. Her lips were slightly parted, the corners turned up in a small smile.

"See you tomorrow," he said, "I'll come up for you."

"I'll be waiting."

He kissed her sweetly, his palm caressing her cheek. "'Til then."

"'Bye."

They spent the day exploring the city and getting to know each other. They ate lunch in a restaurant she didn't think either of them could afford, shared a bottle of expensive Tauron wine and gorged themselves on fresh seafood. After lunch, they wandered hand-in-hand through the local shops.

That evening, they ate at a small diner that served authentic Scorpion dishes and wandered around until they found a small bar. They found a booth in a dark corner and cuddled up together. Their waitress briefly interrupted the intimate bubble they had created to take their order and bring them their drinks.

Much later, he walked her back to the hotel and escorted her up to her room. They shared hungry kisses; Laura, having pinned him against the door, molded her body to his. He returned her kisses with equal fervor until the door opened behind him and she pushed him inside.

He broke away from her, both gasping, eyes beholding one another with a hunger neither had ever experienced or known was possible.

"Gods Laura, you test my control," he rasped.

"We're not strangers any more," she said. She offered an impish smile and she slowly unbuttoned her blouse. "And we both know this is what we want."

He blinked, staring at her as she removed her shirt and stood before him in a crimson bra and jeans slung low on her hips. "Uhh."

"That's all you have to say?"

She hid her uncertainty and discomfort well. Outwardly, she appeared composed and confident, standing before him with her hands on her hips but inside she was uncertain and afraid of rejection. His lack of response was rapidly shredding her confidence and she wrapped her arms around her waist.

"Don't," he said hoarsely.

"What?" she tittered nervously.

"You're absolutely gorgeous," he breathed.

She blushed to the roots of her hair; she wasn't expecting him to say anything quite so flattering. Lowering her head, she tried to hide her embarrassment from him but he was having none of that.

Adama stepped forward and lifted her chin with a forefinger. He offered a tender smile in apology and she returned it. Then he pulled her tightly against him, kissing her with all the passion he felt for her. Her eager response sent a surge of male pride through him; this was really going to happen, here, now, with this beautiful woman.

Clothing fell to the floor carelessly as they explored each other's bodies. Her body felt heavy as his lips explored the sensitive flesh of her neck, chest and breasts. Weak-kneed, she faltered and he led her to the bed on the side of the room she appeared to occupy, laying her down.

She smiled up at him slyly and tugged slightly on his shoulder. He responded with an eager grin and settled above her on hands and knees, his eyes searching hers. There was no doubt this was what she wanted and he squelched the desire to giggle like a boy.

"Make love to me," she murmured.

The doors to the balcony were open wide, the shears billowing in the breeze. The pounding of the surf was audible, as were the faint sounds of a woman singing about love lost. Bill and Laura lay curled together on her bed, enjoying the languorous aftermath.

"How is your mother?" he asked.

She stiffened in his arms and he kissed the top of her head, hugging her tighter. Lifting her head from his chest, she stared into his eyes for a long moment before responding.

"She's dying, Bill," she choked out.

Pulling her into his arms, he held her as she sobbed. His hands caressed her back as he whispered his apologies, knowing how ineffective they were in the face of her grief. There never was any good way to express sorrow over the death of another; it always sounded so weak, so useless.

"I'm sorry, I know this isn't what you were expecting," she sniffled. Wiping her eyes with her hands, she smiled stiffly and began caressing his bare chest with her fingertips. "Let's forget about this subject."

"Let's not. And it's not upsetting me or ruining the mood. This is important; you're dealing with the impending loss of your mother and it's breaking your heart. Therefore, it's hurting me too."

She nodded, her eyes shining with tears. Kissing him tenderly, she rested her head on his shoulder and thanked the Gods for bringing this man into her life.

"La La? Is that you?" Evelyn Roslin asked softly.

"Yeah mama, it's me. How are you feeling?"

"I'm ready for the party."

The two exchanged a laugh. Until her mother began to cough and Laura's stomach dropped. She sat on the edge of her mother's bed and took her hand, trying to calm the sick woman.

"Ssh, just lie back and breathe slow and deep," she murmured. Wrenching her eyes away from the pale, gaunt woman, Laura's found Bill's eyes and tried to smile. "Mama, there's someone I'd like you to meet."

"I knew you'd find a boyfriend," she teased, her voice hoarse.

"Mama," she scolded, her face burning, "Be nice. This is Bill. Bill, this is my mom, Evelyn Roslin."

"Hello, Mrs. Roslin. It's a pleasure to meet you," he said.

"Hello, Bill. Nice to meet you."

"So has La La told you why I'm here?"

"Yes ma'am."

"I was hoping I'd be out of here by now, but it seems that I've taken a turn for the worst."

"Don't say that, mama," Laura whispered, her voice trembling, "You're going to get out of here soon and then we're going to enjoy Scorpia like you'd intended."

"Bill, I need to speak with her, please."

"Of course. I'll uh, be in the hall if you need me."

"Thank you. And it was so nice to meet you."

"You're welcome and likewise."

Laura didn't speak until the door closed behind Bill. "Mama, stop saying that you're going to die here. You're going to be fine."

"I'm not going to be fine, baby. I've talked to the doctors, the cancer has spread and on top of the pneumonia…well, it's just a matter of time."

"No."

"Yes baby. I know you don't want to, but you have to accept this."

"No!"

"La La, there are some things I need to tell you. Some things you need to understand and take care of after I'm gone. There is plenty of money left to get you through the next year. After you graduate from high school, you'll be on your own—we aren't millionaires."

"Mama, they'll force me into the system! I'll have to go live with strangers!"

"No you won't, as long as you're careful."

"How can you be sure?"

"Because I just know. Do as you've always done and no one will know the difference. The only other solution is you getting married. Then you're emancipated and your age won't matter."

"Mama!"

"I'll agree to it if it keeps you out of the system," she said tiredly. "Talk to your young man, see if he agrees. You can always have it annulled later."

"I can't—I'm not ready for this, mama."

"I know, baby, I know. But you're going to have to make some tough choices now. Whatever you decide, I'm behind you." She took a shuddering breath and closed her eyes. "I'm tired now. Why don't you talk to Bill about it and come back later?"

"Ok."

"I love you, La La. I hope you understand I only want what's best for you."

"I know you do. I love you too."

Evelyn smiled. "Kiss your mama and go talk to the man."

Laura did as her mother told her to and slowly left the room. Upon seeing her face, Bill took her hand and kissed it.

"Is everything all right?"

"I think it's time we talked, Bill."

The End


	2. Surviving Isn't Living

Surviving Isn't Living

By: LittleStrawbaby

Rating: T

A/N: This is a sequel to The Queen of Scorpia.

For a moment, the world tilted on its axis. After all these years, to meet him again, like this. For a moment, she cursed herself and her stupidity. How could she not have guessed Adar would do something so underhanded and cruel?

But despite her inclination to strike out at her young aide, it wasn't his fault and he didn't deserve her wrath. Rather, she smiled, gritting her teeth, mentally reciting the Articles of Colonization.

With forced politeness, she excused herself. Once in the ladies, she took deep, calming breaths, replaying their brief exchange in her mind.

He'd been as visibly shaken as she when they laid eyes on each other. However, masks of professionalism had quickly dropped back into place and veiled hostility took up position. Until she'd suggested networking the computers, then all traces of the polite-host pretense fell away. Unable to help it, she retorted, her words dripping with sarcasm and deeper meaning. The point hit home and he stalked away.

Billy had the good sense not to ask or make any comments.

She alone was the first to applaud his speech and he knew he'd made an impact. He saw her from the corner of his eye, her expression soft, but never revealed it outwardly. He noted with pride that he still had the ability to move her. A part of him was thrilled by this but another part of him was angered.

How dare she stroll back into his life to put his ship out to pasture? Even worse, turn it into a museum! The irrational, wounded part of him entertained the notion that she had pushed this to hurt him further. The more rational part of him knew it wasn't likely—it was more probable that she didn't even remember his name.

At this point, his last day as the Commander of the Battlestar Galactica was a total disaster. When he awoke that morning, he'd never envisioned the day would be so difficult or painful.

Until it got worse.

_Oh for the love of the Gods_! She felt like screaming. As the days turned into weeks, she wished she had disobeyed Adar and remained behind to be annihilated with the rest of Caprica. The dead were the lucky ones.

As the whiny demands increased, Laura's patience diminished. She wanted to rage at the Quorum, to remind them that at least they had their health. She lived with pain and the knowledge that she would die. Soon.

Instead, she sat quietly. She appeared to be listening but her mind was wandering. Her gaze fell on Captain Apollo and she wondered what to do. He had attached himself to her skirts like a toddler and she had immediately responded to him. She feared what she felt for him, how much and how deeply it ran.

Realizing he was staring back at her with concern, she blinked and offered a small smile. Turning her attention to the folder in front of her, her thoughts drifted to her co-leader and their uneasy alliance.

In her heart, she knew he was in a better position to distrust her and had every right to, given their history. Still, it stuck in her craw that he got to take the high road.

Stubbornly, she had refused to think of the past—she hadn't thought of it in years. It was easier to pretend it didn't exist.

He couldn't believe her nerve. How _dare_ she use Lee against him? They had survived the initial attacks together, he could understand the bond they'd formed. Asking Lee to be her military advisor had angered him but he understood the need for a buffer and welcomed it.

Now she'd gone too far. Turning his adopted daughter against him and stealing Lee's absolute loyalty was so far over the line he couldn't see it any more. He knew without a doubthe'd crossed a line when he imprisoned her, but he couldn't think about that now. He had to congratulate Boomer and decide what to do next.

He'd never imagined that things would come to this. It was unexpected, her shooting him point blank in the chest. He heard Lee crying out to him. Before the world went dark, he wondered, briefly, if _she_ would even react.

She could hear the anger in Lee's voice, at her and himself. When he relayed that his father had been shot, her stomach dropped. It had taken all of her strength not to fall to her knees.

Her words were ineffective and weak, even she knew it. But what else could she say? Nothing. No words could ever be enough.

She laid down on her cot and made herself small. It was all she could do to keep herself together.

He couldn't say he was surprised when he woke to learn she was gone. Given the way she'd wrapped Lee around her finger, his absence wasn't shocking either.

Their disappearing act was easy to ignore when he was on shift in CIC or in physical therapy. It was hard to focus on anything else when he was alone in his quarters.

It was Dee who forcibly yanked his head out of his ass. She reminded him of the promises he'd made. She'd reminded him of the importance of keeping the fleet together. Inadvertently, she reminded him of something else, something he'd forgotten years ago. Something his rage had blinded him to.

"We caused this," he said softly, "We have to fix it. It's always been between us anyway."

As they sat in her make-shift shelter, they spoke of everything but the past. Knowing him as she did, she knew this meant he had come to terms with it and let it go. He offered her his forgiveness, something she hadn't asked for but secretly desired. If anyone needed to beg forgiveness it was her, but she couldn't—it would open a Pandora's box she honestly could not deal with. Perhaps she never could.

They returned to the fleet united, staunchly in support of each other. After they resumed having each other's back, he walked her to her shuttle. And she stuck a toe over the line. Not because she wanted to hurt him but to reassure him.

"Bill," she said, still trying to become accustomed to using his first name again, "I want to tell you something."

"Go ahead."

A part of her bristled, immediately thinking, _I'm not one of your godsdamned soldiers!_ Ultimately, she realized it was a part of him, not a need to command, and she relaxed.

"Lee doesn't know anything."

He stiffened but did not falter. Gripping her arm, he pulled her into an empty, cavernous room. Bill was puffed up like a toad and Laura was examining the room and the possibilities.

"Don't, Laura. Do not bring him into this."

"Bill, no. I want you to know, to understand, that he followed me of his own free will, not out of obligation. He doesn't know anything."

Understanding dawned and he nodded. He released her arm, lacing his fingers together. She offered a small smile, ignoring the residual pain the pressure of his fingers had caused. Unconsciously, she rubbed the spot but did not break eye contact.

"Did I hurt you?" he rumbled softly.

"It's all right." She chuckled softly, "Some days the lightest touch hurts. Comes with the disease."

He couldn't hide his own pain at the unemotional way she spoke about her illness. She touched his arm, giving him a ghost of a smile.

"I don't want your pity or sympathy, Bill. I wish I'd never told you now because this isn't what I want."

"You'll never have my pity. But you forget I know what the road ahead holds for you. I was there for some of it. I'm not going to let you go through that alone."

"It's not your responsibility. You don't owe me anything."

"I'm volunteering for duty, Madame President." He offered a grin, his heart lightening when she responded in kind. "Besides, you need more than an aide at your side. I know he cares about you and you think of him as family, but there are some things you can't talk about with the children."

She lowered her eyes, an acknowledgement that he absolutely had a valid point. Billy could not help her with her feelings about her disease and she would never burden him with such a heavy load. Especially given his blossoming romance with Dualla and his need to share.

"Laura, I'm not doing this because I feel some leftover obligation. I want to. Because you need someone; someone who knows you and all of your evasive maneuvers."

A giggle escaped her and she covered her mouth, a faint blush on her sculpted cheekbones. He playfully tugged on a stray curl. Even now, she could feel everything between them; everything that was, everything that is.

Her eyes were soft as she stared into his, her hand covering one side of his face. As he leaned into her touch, her eyes burned with tears.

The past was laid to rest.

The End


	3. Never Been To Me A

A/N: This is a follow-up to "Surviving Isn't Living."

She collapsed onto his chest, gasping for breath. A radiant smile graced her face as his hands tenderly caressed the length of her spine. As his soft words penetrated the hazy aftermath, she lifted her head, her gaze meeting his.

"What?"

"I uh, nothing."

"No, seriously."

His face darkened slightly and he muttered, "Frak, I feel like an idiot."

"You know you can tell me anything. Just say it."

"I said, we're as good as I remember." He scowled. "Happy now?"

"Yes," she giggled, kissing the tip of his nose, "And I concur."

He grinned broadly, flipping her onto her back. She squealed, clutching his arms, wrapping one of her gloriously long legs around his. After a moment, her expression turned serious.

"What's wrong?"

"Do you—do you ever think about us? Before, I mean?"

"Laura," he sighed. He rolled off of her and onto his back, raking his fingers through his thick dark hair. "I thought we agreed."

"You brought it up," she reminded. She turned onto her side, propping her head on her hand, looking down at him. "I do."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I think we weren't meant to be together then. I was too immature, I needed you too much, especially after—"

"Your mother."

"Yeah."

"It wasn't all your fault, La La."

Her eyes welled with tears at the affectionate nickname her mother had given her and he had picked up. It had been too many years since she'd heard it.

"You think so?"

"I know so. I went off and left you—" He was interrupted by the handset buzzing insistently. He growled and lifted it to his ear. "Adama."

She watched his face change from mild irritation to a high level of irritation.

"One moment." He covered the mouthpiece, "It's Tory for Madame President."

Laura rolled her eyes. _Never a dull moment._ "Yes, Tory?"

Her lips compressed into a thin line and her eyes crinkled at the corners, a sign of her own displeasure.

"Tell the Quorum I'm currently tangled with the Admiral and I'll be late."

With a firm nod, she handed the receiver back to Adama to hang up.

"Well, that'll give 'em something to talk about," he said wryly.

"I do my best," was her glib response.

The moment was lost and they shared sweet kisses before giving in to the pull of responsibility. They shared a shower, wherein Bill broke the rules and touched Laura, which led to passionate shower sex.

The aftermath left Laura weak-kneed and drowsy. Bill, on the other hand, was still radiating 'I just had the best sex ever' vibes as she hurried out of his quarters to her meeting.

She prayed neither of them allowed their poker faces to slip.

The day had been long and trying for him. It had been especially hard because it was emotionally difficult. He had confronted the two people closest to him, called them on the carpet and told them to frak off unless they planned to shape up. He'd gone so far as to offer Tigh a gun and dared him to pull the trigger.

Returning to his quarters afterwards, he sat on his couch, head in hands, mulling over the day. It had started out so well. Now he could only hope Laura would come by soon. He wanted to talk to her, to take comfort in her embrace. He hoped her day wasn't as bad as his or they were really screwed.

Removing his jacket and laying it over the back of the sofa, he crossed the room and poured himself a generous glass of Tyrol's home brew. He sucked in a breath as it burned a path to his stomach.

Setting the glass on the table, he sat back, staring into space. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He called to mind an image of her, reveling in the calm she resonated.

"Laura," he said softly, a prayer, "Please come home soon."

She'd heard about the incidents Thrace and Tigh had instigated. Tory, shortly before her meeting with Zarek broke up, informed her of Adama's come to Gods meeting with the two. As this was her last meeting of the day and it was winding down, she decided to have a chat with Starbuck. It was long overdue.

While Tory certainly wasn't the fountain of information, gossip and networking that Billy had been, she did have a way of 'overhearing' things. It was because of Tory the President was now aware of Thrace's failing marriage and the gorgeous child she'd come aboard Galactica with but turned over to someone else.

The young woman wouldn't be happy she was sticking her nose in, but Madame President had a thing or two to tell her. And it was all based on first-hand experience. Bitter experience.

She reached the pilot's lounge and asked her guards to keep everyone away until she returned. She entered and was surprised by the silence that greeted her in such a well-populated area.

Thrace was seated alone and garnering dirty looks by the others. Upon realizing their President stood in the hatchway, they immediately stood at attention. All but Thrace, whose back was to the door.

Roslin cleared her throat. "I'd like to have a word with Lieutenant Thrace, please."

The pilots nodded respectfully and made a hasty exit, leaving the two alone.

Roslin crossed the room to Starbuck's table. Without asking, she took a seat, folding her hands in her lap.

"Lieu—Kara, I'm not the type to interfere in other people's personal lives, but there is something I'd like to tell you."

"Ma'am, all due respect, but I don't want or need advice from a spinster school teacher," Thrace snapped.

Laura felt as if she'd been slapped. However, she quickly realized Kara was making a preemptive strike and took a breath.

"I was married at sixteen. My mother was dying of breast cancer and I met him while we were on our last vacation together.

"She got pneumonia and had to be hospitalized. We met in a bar and after spending a few hours together, it was true love. We were convinced it was, anyway."

Thrace met the President's eyes, shocked. Quickly, she hid her feelings behind a mask of apathy. "So? What's your point?"

"My mother died, but not before consenting to our marriage. Looking back, I'd say I got pregnant on purpose, trying to fill the hole in my heart she left and trying to keep my husband with me."

"So your marriage crapped out because you got knocked up on purpose?" Kara was now interested despite herself.

"No, it was because my husband got bored with our little life and being stuck planet-side. He accepted a job as a merchant marine."

"He left you pregnant?" she demanded.

"Yes, but neither of us knew that at the time. The first time they docked and he called home, I told him."

"Did he come home?"

"He got leave to be home for the birth. A week after our son was born, he was back on a transport."

"Was it his choice or orders?"

"His choice."

"What a prick!" Kara screeched. "What did you do?"

"For a year, I did the best I could. My closest friend was a great help and comfort. But she couldn't help me with everything.

"One afternoon, I packed my son up, called her and asked her to baby sit. I dropped him off, went back home, packed up my things and left. I never looked back."

"You left your kid? Just like that?"

"It's not anything I'm proud of, but yes," Laura said softly. "I was seventeen years old with a one year old child. He may not have meant to do it, but he virtually isolated me from the world when he left me alone, a child raising a child. I didn't even finished high school; I dropped out when I started showing."

"My Gods, I can't believe this," Kara whispered. "But you were a teacher! How did you manage that?"

"After I left them, I went home to my mother's house. I finished high school and enrolled in a community college. I had my name legally changed back to Roslin and after I'd gotten my core classes completed, I switched to Caprica University and graduated with honors."

"Your husband never came looking for you? Not once?"

"Yes, he did. I came home from school one afternoon and found several messages from him on my answering machine. I listened to them and deleted them. I got divorce papers from him a few months later. I signed them, couriered them back and never heard from him again."

"And even after you got your life together, you didn't try to get your son back? Didn't you love him?"

"Of course I loved him. To this day, my heart aches for what I did to him, for abandoning him and my responsibilities to him. I've never stopped loving him."

"Fat lot of good that does you now," Kara muttered, "He's dead somewhere on Caprica."

"No, he isn't," Laura said, her voice strong, "Neither is his father. They're both alive and well within the fleet."

"You've gotta be frakkin' kiddin' me! No frakkin' way!"

"Yes frakkin' way."

"Who—do I know them?"

"Yes. You nearly married my son's half brother. You see, I was married to Bill Adama. Lee is our son."

Kara Thrace heard a strange buzzing in her ears, her face paling. Gently, Laura pushed the girl's head between her knees and spoke softly to her, soothing her. After a moment, she lifted her head, staring into green eyes that were deceptively innocent—for Kara knew better than anyone how dangerous this woman could be.

"How could you do that to them?" she asked plaintively. "How could you abandon them to the likes of Carol Anne?"

"Carol Anne was my best friend, once upon a time. She was also rather taken with my husband and our life. I figured, why not give her what she wanted? I couldn't handle it, perhaps she could. In the end, though, I learned from Lee that she couldn't handle the abandonment either.

"I've revealed this to you for one reason, Lieutenant, which we'll get to in a moment. For now, I'm asking you to keep this to yourself because this won't hurt just me, you'll ruin all three of us."

"I'll never tell," she whispered, her brown eyes wide. "I just have to know, why did you do it?"

"I was a child with a woman's responsibilities. I married him out of childish love and because my mother was dying. It was her wish that I remain out of the foster care system. Bill, who loved me with the same childish love, wanted the same. Our decision was made before we'd really even discussed it."

"That doesn't answer the question."

Laura sighed deeply, removing her glasses, her last line of defense. "Because I loved my husband and my son too much. I couldn't allow my son to be poisoned by my anger at his father for leaving us and I couldn't allow my husband to grow to resent me for needing him too much. It was best for me to bow out and let the chips fall as they may.

"Instead of saving them, I damaged them in another way. Bill married Carol Anne out of desperation; his son needed a mother and he couldn't bear to be chained to Caprica. Carol Anne got a bird's eye view of my life and in a strange way, recreated it by having Zac. And you know the rest of that story."

"Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit. Who the frak would have guessed that you had such a juicy, tragic love story in your past?"

Laura's eyes cut to Thrace and realized, after a moment of careful scrutiny, that the younger woman was teasing her. She smiled and shook her head. Kara was nothing if not amusing to the part of Laura Roslin that longed to be the woman she'd been before cancer and crushing responsibility overtook her. The woman who'd found respite on New Caprica and flirted shamelessly with Bill Adama in a tantalizing red dress.

"Who indeed?" Laura chuckled.

"I really swear I won't tell anyone," Kara reassured.

"I know, Kara. I just want you to understand why I'm telling you this."

"It wasn't just to unburden your weary soul?"

Laura laughed. "You wish. No, there is a reason for this soul-bearing conversation."

"All right, let's get to it. I have a feeling it isn't gonna bode well for me and the night is still young. I can still get a lot of drinking in."

end part A


End file.
